Through The Closet Door
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by Rick R. Reed
Category: Erotica/Gay-Lesbian Erotica/Erotic Romance
Description: Gregory has all the pieces in place: youth, good looks, a beautiful wife, a job he loves as an elementary school teacher, a quiet house on the beach... So why is Gregory so miserable? Why is he unable to control his lingering gaze on his neighbor, Jake, the handsome truck driver who lives just down the way from him? Why does Gregory spend his private time keeping a secret journal that details fantasies and memories of him locked in embraces with other men? It's summer, and the peaceful lake belies the turmoil in Gregory's heart. His wife wants to start a family, while Gregory wants to start something with Jake, but doesn't dare. Rick R. Reed's heartbreaking new story brings to painful life the consequences of coming out of the closet when you're married and no one in the world but you knows the secrets you harbor. Gregory's mask is slipping, pulled down by the allure of a handsome neighbor and the demands of a desire that gets only louder the more he tries to quiet it. Climbing out of the closet is never easy...but it's even more difficult when doing so might shatter the lives of those around you... Genres: Gay / Contemporary
eBook Publisher: Amber Quill Press, 2008
eBookwise Release Date: July 2009
8 Reader Ratings:
Available eBook Formats: OEBFF Format (IMP) [60 KB]
Reading time: 34-48 min.
"4.5 Stars!...This story is very short but no less impactful because of its length. Rick R. Reed's writing is as wonderful as ever and his characterizations, which are his signature, are superb. If you ever want to understand how difficult it is for a gay man to come out of the closet after living his life as straight, even to the point of getting married in an attempt to deny who he is, this is a must read. Coming out of the closet is never easy! Buy this book."--Wave, Reviews By Jessewave
"A Rating Of 4.5!...The pacing and writing...[were] very well done. Reed has an ability to elicit complex emotions with poignant characters. The ending was clearly meant to be left hanging as the character was, on the cusp of a painful but necessary journey. It demonstrates the true strength and conflict that are involved as a gay man comes to terms with his sexuality, his desires and needs, making that scary and painful step out of the closet."--Kassa, Manic Readers
"4.5 Stars!...A heartbreakingly emotional story about a man at a crossroads in his life...An incredible story, a powerful look at the difficulty that surrounds coming out of the closet when deeply entrenched in a straight life...Reed has written a phenomenal look at a coming out process that is the definition of emotional. With excellent characters and a tightly woven story, Reed has written a poignant and affecting story that is a must read."--Emily, Rainbow Reviews
"4 Hearts!...Rick R. Reed writes a great tale of a man trying to come to terms with his sexuality. Gregory is an interesting man with deep needs and feelings. He also has a sense of honor trying to live up to his responsibilities and the promises he's made...This is a great story of a gay man coming to terms with the reality of needs that supersede his sense responsibility and desire to conform."--Dee Dailey, The Romance Studio
"4 Angels!...A tender, poignant, and tragic story that highlights how one decision can affect multiple people's lives...The quiet desperation with which Mr. Reed has drawn Gregory makes this story especially good. The depth of emotion that he conveys with a simple turn of phrase is at times genius..."--Hayley, Fallen Angel Reviews
"Jesus. You did have a fight. You're so tense. Relax and let old Jake take care of untangling those bunched-up muscles."
Gregory wants nothing more. This feels so right and so wrong ... all at the same time. He shouldn't be doing this. Reluctantly, he moves forward, so that Jake's hands will drop from his back. The absence of Jake's touch makes him long for more, like some deep-seated hunger that is simple minded in its pursuit of satisfaction.
"Sh-h. Listen, it's okay," Jake whispers and leans close to Gregory, his chest pressed against Gregory's back.
Impulsively, Gregory turns and hugs him. He is more surprised by his action than he imagines Jake is. The intense brown of Jake's eyes is apparent, even in the dark. Gregory feels he could lose himself in the brown, letting it swallow him up like a cold spot in the lake. The feel of Jake's body so close, the strong arms wrapped around him are like a blessing, a relief after so much denial.
Then Jake is leaning close, and Gregory feels the soft pressure of his lips on his own. Gregory closes his eyes, shutting everything out save for the soft cool of Jake's mouth on his. He lets his head go back, parts his lips to admit Jake's tongue and, almost of its own accord, his hand comes up, grabbing Jake at the nape of his neck and pulling him closer. The feel of Jake's beard against his smooth skin is electric, and Gregory finds himself out of control, lost, as he mashes his mouth against the other man's, his tongue dueling, the taste of beer and cigarettes and something indefinable and sweet filling his mouth.
An image of Rosemary intrudes, that same image of her standing near the window, watching for his return, wondering what he's doing. And what is he doing?
Just as suddenly as the kiss begins, it stops as Gregory stiffens, leaning back. Jake pulls away, regarding him out of the corner of his eye, back against the porch swing. Jake is breathless. He lets out a small laugh, husky.
Gregory forces himself to scoot down on the bench a couple of inches, so that their contact disappears. He doesn't want this to end, yet at the same time, sees no other road open to him. He can't live split in two. Weakly, he mumbles, "I have to get up early tomorrow."
"Sure," Jake whispers, reaching for another cigarette. The flare of the lighter illuminates his face for a moment and Gregory is certain he can see frustration and disappointment in the other man's craggy features. He exhales smoke and looks out toward the lake. "I understand. You run along now. Be a good little boy."
And Jake puts a finger to Gregory's lips, the lips he's just kissed. "Hey, don't worry about it, man. Believe it or not, I was married once, too, even have a couple of kids, so I know. I know."
Gregory is off the porch and swallowed up by the darkness before Jake has a chance to say another word. He stomps through the night, his footfalls hard, firm, and rapid as he heads back toward his own home ... and Rosemary. He doesn't question why his breath is catching and why his face is covered with salty tears.