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Category: Gay Fiction/Erotica
Description: Christmas is Kyle Slidell's favorite holiday, and since it's his first with his mate Tobias Rogan, Kyle wants to make it special. But Tobias wants nothing to do with the holiday. When Tobias leaves "for the night" and doesn't return, Kyle tracks him down on Christmas Eve. Can he change his mate's mind and have the special holiday he desires?
eBook Publisher: MLR Press, LLC,
eBookwise Release Date: January 2012

4 Reader Ratings:

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Available eBook Formats: OEBFF Format (IMP) [69 KB]
Words: 14897
Reading time: 42-59 min.

Chapter One

Ah, Christmas cheer. Snow, eggnog, pretty lights that had nothing to do with the airport less than a mile away.

And a lover who didn't seem to want anything to do with any of it.

Christmas Eve was three days away, and I'd just finished decking out my apartment for the season. It had taken me a few days. Most holidays weren't all that big a deal to me, but I'd always loved Christmas. I'd spent the past week putting up decorations around my living room and kitchen, and even a few in the bedroom. Tobias hadn't been allowed in. I wanted him to see the full effect.

Now I was finished, so at nine o'clock at night, I trudged through the snowy garden between my apartment and Tobias's and tapped on his kitchen door.

He opened the door wearing just a pair of cotton gym shorts. My mouth watered at the sight of his bare chest and the bulge in those shorts. His long brown hair hung loose, and I had a sudden urge to run my hands through it before I guided his head to my suddenly-hard cock.

"Kyle." His smile with the little dimples at the corners of his mouth sent flame rocketing through me. "I didn't think I'd see you tonight. You said you were busy with work."

"I was busy, but not with work." I took his hand. "Put on your shoes and come to my place. I want to show you something."

"It's freezing out there." He blew a puff of warm breath at me to prove his point.

"You're a werewolf. Cold air doesn't bother you." I tugged his hand again. "Come on."

He shook his head with a tolerant smile. "You're excited about something, so I guess I'd better find out what. Come in while I put something else on. I'm not walking across the garden dressed like this."

"Why not?"

He rolled his eyes. "Just get in here."

I entered the apartment and pulled Tobias into a long kiss. He tried to pull away for about half a second, but he and I both knew he didn't want to stop kissing me. I pressed my cock against his through our clothes and wished the clothes weren't in the way. I wanted him so badly I almost yanked his shorts off him right there.

"I thought you wanted to show me something," he said, barely parting his lips from mine. He reached between us and squeezed my dick. I gasped. "If this is it, why do I have to go outside?"

I grabbed his wrist. "That isn't it, though I definitely wouldn't mind showing it to you."

"Maybe later." He pulled away from me with a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "I'll need you to warm me up after we walk across the garden."

"Sure." I could think of all kinds of ways for us to warm each other up.

He pulled on a T-shirt and sweatpants over his shorts and slipped bare feet into his sneakers. The snow wouldn't bother him--it hadn't bothered me, either, although I'd walked over in the button-down shirt, slacks, and loafers I'd worn to work that day. Werewolves didn't feel the cold, at least not as much as humans. This was my first winter as a werewolf and I was entertained by being able to walk around in thirty-degree weather without a winter coat.

Of course, I was careful not to do that too often. I didn't want too many questions from the humans who saw me.

Hand in hand, Tobias and I went back across the garden to my place. "Close your eyes," I said before I opened the door.

"What's going on, Kyle?" he asked impatiently.

"Just close your eyes. Come on, humor me." The man had no sense of playfulness. Well, almost none. He'd improved a little since I'd met him. I took the credit for that.

He let out an exaggerated sigh. "Oh, fine." He closed his eyes and put his hands over them for good measure. "Lead me in. If I trip over anything, I'm dragging you down with me."

"I fail to see that as a bad thing, especially if one of us lands on the other." I opened the door and took his arm. "Step up and you'll be inside."

He followed my direction and I let go of him. "Don't open them yet," I said. "I'll tell you when."

"This had better be worth it, Kyle."

"It will be." It had better be after I spent a week on it

I hurried around the apartment, plugging in the lights that I hadn't wanted showing through the windows as we crossed the garden. Tobias stayed where I'd told him and kept his eyes closed, though he grumbled quite a bit. I ignored the grumbling. I didn't care what he said as long as he did what I'd asked.

Finally everything was lit up like a Christmas tree--including the Christmas tree, a four-foot high artificial one I'd bought the week before. Usually I preferred the scent of real trees, but I'd discovered that with my new super-sensitive shifter nose, the aroma was too much to handle. So I'd given the real tree I'd started out with to a non-werewolf neighbor a couple buildings over and had bought the artificial one instead.

I went back into the kitchen and shut off the overhead light. Only the Christmas lights remained, but there were enough of them that the room was almost as bright as if the main light had remained on.

"Okay," I said. "Open your eyes."

Tobias did. His mouth dropped open, and he turned around to take in the full effect of the lights outlining the windows and door. I hadn't been able to find hooks to hang the lights outside, so I'd put them around the inside of the door instead.

Without a word, he walked slowly into the living room and stopped by the tree. "What the hell is all this?"

"Um, it's Christmas," I said. "You might have heard of it. Big holiday celebrated on December twenty-fifth? People get all decorated up and buy presents and stuff?"

He rotated in a slow circle, looking at the lights, the wall hangings, and finally the tree once again. "I wouldn't have thought you'd be the type to get this crazy about a holiday."

"It was always a big deal when I was a kid." I frowned. Something wasn't right here. He was supposed to be excited about the decorations and the holiday. Instead he looked about as unimpressed as someone could be. "You met my parents and sister. We're a close family. Even after I moved out, I went home every year on Christmas Eve and slept in my old bed so I could wake up at home Christmas morning."

"That's nice," he muttered. "Kyle, why did you think I'd want all this? I mean, if you did it for me, I don't care about Christmas, so you wasted your time."

That stung. I didn't think any of it was a waste of time. "I did it for me," I snapped. "What's the matter with you? Are you channeling Ebenezer Scrooge or something? I thought you'd like it. It's our first Christmas together, and I wanted to do something you'd like. Is that a bad thing?"

"It's something I don't want." He looked at the tree again. "Let me guess. You brought some of these ornaments from home, right? Passed down in your family from generation to generation and shit?" His voice hardened. "Nice. Really nice tree. I'm damn glad you didn't do this shit to my house."

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" I stepped in front of him. Not that I was the most intimidating guy in the world, but I wasn't about to let him get away with insulting my decorations. "If you don't like it, say so. You don't have to be an asshole about it."

"Nope, I don't have to be." He headed back into the kitchen. "The place looks good, Kyle. At least if you're into all the holiday bullshit. Come back to my place if you want to spend some time together tonight. I can't stay here."

Before I could say another word, he was out the door.

I stood by the window and watched him stomp back to his apartment. His shoulders were slumped, and if I hadn't known better I would have thought he was crying, or at least close to it.

I couldn't understand what had just happened. All I'd wanted to do was make Tobias happy. Give him some Christmas cheer. It had been a crappy fall for both of us, stressful and upsetting. Thanksgiving had been a non-event since neither of us had really felt like giving thanks for anything except each other and the rest of our pack. I had hoped that Christmas, which had always seemed like a magical time to me, would make things better.

Apparently I'd just made everything worse.

I thought about going after him. Maybe spending some time snuggling on his couch. Touch was very soothing to Tobias, and I was pretty much the only person who understood that. If I went over to his place and just held him for a while, maybe he would feel better.

The problem was, I was a little too pissed off to do that.

Since I'd been changed into a werewolf six months earlier, I'd only seen my family once. And that was the last time I would ever see them. It was against shifter law for humans to find out about us, and since we aged far more slowly than humans, pretty much no shifters kept in contact with their families. Tobias and I had gone to visit my parents and sister in September, when we'd been in Pennsylvania for the regional alpha conference. That had been my farewell visit to them, though of course I hadn't been allowed to tell them that.

This would be the first Christmas ever that I hadn't spent with my family. I'd counted on Tobias to be my family now, and he'd insulted me instead.

Family.

Light dawned. That was Tobias's problem. He hadn't seen his family at all since he'd been changed, and he'd only been fifteen at the time. Thirty-five years without an actual family Christmas. And from what he'd told me, his family life hadn't been great, so I wasn't sure how Christmas had been for him before he'd been changed.

No wonder he had a major case of the humbugs.

I would have to do something to change that. Obviously I couldn't bring him to his family. Tracking them down wouldn't have been too hard, but after that many years, seeing them again probably wouldn't have made things any easier for Tobias. Plus there was the fact that even though Tobias was around fifty, he only looked like he was in his early thirties. That would raise too many questions.

I could make this a good Christmas for him, though. For us. I just had to figure out how without making things even worse than I already had.

I switched off most of the Christmas lights, just leaving the ones around the street-side windows, and went back to Tobias's. I didn't bother knocking this time, just walked right in. I rarely knocked anyway, unless I wanted to surprise him or thought he might be in the middle of something important.

He was in his living room. The TV was the only light. "Are you okay?" I asked.

"Of course I am." He didn't look at me. "There's such a thing as too much holiday, Kyle. That's something you might want to learn."

"I decorated just like that last year."

"I didn't know you then. I didn't have to deal with it." He turned off the TV, leaving us mostly in the dark except for the glow from the streetlight out front. "Think about everything that's happened the past few months, Kyle. After all that, what do we have to be happy about? Isn't that what we said at Thanksgiving, that there really wasn't anything to celebrate?"

"I know what's happened. I don't need to think about it." I knew all too well. I'd killed a man--well, a rogue werewolf who'd been trying to kill me at the time, but he'd reverted to human form when he died. And I'd been responsible for two other deaths as far as I was concerned, though Tobias and several others had tried to convince me I was wrong about that.

"Then what are we celebrating?" he snapped. "For fuck's sake, Kyle, it's a religious holiday. I don't believe in that stuff. Do you?"

"I believe in giving things to people you care about." I folded my arms tightly over my chest so I couldn't draw a deep enough breath to scream at him. "Yeah, fine, Christmas is a religious holiday. That doesn't mean we have to be religious about it. For me, it's about family. About giving to each other. About love."

"You're a lot more naive than I thought you were."

"And you're a lot more of a dickhead." I wrestled my temper back under control. "This conversation obviously isn't going anywhere. I'm sorry you think I'm naive and that you apparently think I've wasted my time with the holiday stuff. I certainly don't want to waste any more of your time."

"You aren't wasting my time." He came over and stood close enough to embrace me, but he didn't touch me. "I love you. You know that. I just--I don't do well with Christmas, Kyle. I'm sorry. We've been spending most of our time here anyway. Let's just keep it that way until the holidays are over and you reclaim your apartment from Santa's elves, all right?"

I rested my palm against his cheek. "I love you too."

He let out a deep breath and relaxed, leaning into my touch. I knew I should say something to make him feel better, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. I wanted to tell him it was okay, but it wasn't. The sadness in his voice, and in his eyes now that he was close enough for me to see, made my heart ache. He wasn't against Christmas just because it was Christmas. There was obviously more to it than that. I just wished I could get him to talk to me about what the problem was.

His soft, warm lips touched mine and I forgot that I'd been angry. I forgot everything except the fact that he was my mate and I was in love with him. We'd almost lost each other after the events of that fall. I had shut myself down so completely that I'd almost severed our mate bond. He hadn't let me get away with it. We'd worked hard after that to rebuild our relationship and keep it going, and I refused to let a holiday come between us.

I just wished the holiday could be something we shared.

I cupped the back of his head with my hand, holding him in our kiss. With my other hand, I reached down and rubbed him through his sweatpants and shorts. He was already mostly hard, and my touch brought him to full hardness.

Desire coursed through me and I shivered. This was what I'd hoped would happen at my place after he saw the wonderfully decorated rooms, but it didn't matter where we were. I loved him and I wanted him.

He moaned against my mouth and pushed his clothes down with one hand to let his cock free. I gripped it firmly and stroked him. His tongue pushed into my mouth and I sucked on it the way I wanted to suck his cock. The way I would suck him once I brought him close enough to the edge that he wouldn't be able to hold back from coming in my mouth. I loved making him lose control when I gave him head, and he had just as much fun trying to keep from losing it.

This time, he surprised me. He unfastened my slacks and shoved them down, then pulled away from me and knelt. He took my cock in both his hands and stroked me for several seconds before sliding one hand down to fondle my balls.

I breathed heavily and thought of my old neighbor's housedress to keep from coming on the spot. It took only the slightest touch from Tobias to turn me on, and when he touched me like this I wanted to explode. I gripped his hair and tried to guide his mouth to my dick, but he held back.

"Not yet," he murmured. "You're going to come in my mouth, then I'm going to get you hard again so you can come in my ass. You have to work tomorrow?"

"You know I do," I panted.

"Then I guess we can't spend all night fucking." He flicked his tongue over the head of my cock and leaned back again to grin up at me. "Let's make the most of the time we have."

"Suck me." I reached for him again, but he leaned back further, still holding my cock. "Damn it, Tobias, suck me!"

"All in good time." He licked his lips. He was enjoying this. Usually he did what I said when it came to sex; he liked not being the one in charge. Apparently tonight he wanted a little variety.

He continued stroking me and playing with me. My legs trembled and I closed my eyes. Seeing Tobias touch me was as much of a turn-on as the touch itself, and I didn't need the sensory overload. If I didn't want to come before he put his mouth on me, I had to hold myself together.

Not that that was easy. Not a bit. My cock ached and I wanted to just let go. Cover him with my cum then lick him clean. That thought, of course, did absolutely nothing to calm me down. I could touch my tongue to every inch of his bare skin. Make him as hard and horny as he was making me. I could--

My cock twitched and I cried out as pleasure exploded into ecstasy. Tobias engulfed me with his mouth just as the first spurt erupted from my dick. He sucked me as I came, filling his mouth and crying his name. My legs shook so hard I would have fallen if I hadn't been able to brace myself on his shoulders.

My body didn't want to cooperate with me. When Tobias released me, I staggered backward and fell onto the couch, breathing hard and trying to persuade myself that I was still in one piece. I'd come so hard it had felt like I'd split into millions of pieces.